Bleeding and Believing

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Site updates

I have uploaded version 5.2 of this blog.

There are new colors in this version plus a new section at the side bar. "Make it your blogger" encourages readers to write their own blogs and use it as their alternate reality. Blogs don't necessarily have to be hosted by "Blogger" because there are other hosts like Xanga, Live Journal, Tabulas, etc. I just used it as a collective term, and of course you can tell I'm biased. Bwahahaha.

I'm no big blogger but I do enjoy blogging. Maybe a lot of people find my blog uninteresting, I really don't care though. I blog for myself and not for anyone else.

If you want to write, blog your thoughts away. You don't have to be a good writer to put up a good blog site. You just need to have the passion for it. So what if you're not a hot shot in grammar? So what if you're not a language master? Just go and blog away.

Shiet. Ang drama.


I'm off to school early because I want to accomplish many things in the lab today. Yesterday was hell and I was jinxed.

My electrode broke twice. I fixed it, only the conducting epoxy takes at least 12 hours to dry-up. What made the day even more shitty was that I walked for two hours along Avenida (Bambang part), entered each store in sight, and looked for the special vials I need for my thesis. I found out that they're not sold anymore. Phased-out.

How jinxed can you get?

posted by Dorxie at 7:30 AM   [ 0 comments ]
Tuesday, November 22, 2005

What the f*ck is the title of the song?

I'm desperate. I have to know the title of that freaking Sunsilk song.

The first time I saw the Sunsilk Soft Touch commercial, I didn't notice the song right away. I was staring at the girl's funny nose and how she avoided the guy to touch her oh-so-long-looks nice-but-unexpectedly-dry locks.

The next time I saw the commercial, the first line of the song caught my attention, "You turn my head but instead..." I think the lyrics are nice and so I searched for it online. Typed some parts of the song only because some lines were unclear. And I found out that a lot of people are actually looking for it too. So far, there's no luck for any of us.

If you know the song, please email me asap or leave a message at the tag board.

Help me before I turn completely psycho on myself.


And because I can't find the song online, I went to the grocery to find and buy the product itself.

Yeah, it gives your a hair a nice, soft touch. Plus volume and fullness. Plus healthy look. OKAY. I'm over reacting. But really, it's good.

Try it. Just don't mistake it for the other pink Sunsilk. I'm not sure if the other pink Sunsilk shampoo is already phased-out.

(Libreng advertisment ng product!)


Tatah! I'm off to conquer Bambang, the lab materials heaven. It's a long day.

posted by Dorxie at 11:24 AM   [ 0 comments ]
Monday, November 21, 2005

Blah blah blah

Watched Harry Potter with mom, Jhozelle, and Abi. Talk about family bonding. =)

Daniel Radcliffe is now a hottie. But I like the guy who plays Victor. Haha!

Oh, and I like Emma Watson's curls. I liked it before, now I love it even more. I have to get one as soon as my hair grows. =)


Please vote for my blog in Pinoy top blogs. The link can be found in the credits section of this page. Thanks!

posted by Dorxie at 12:02 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Sunday, November 20, 2005

Welcome to my LAB life

My accelerated MS course requires me to finish my degree in just a year. Impossible, I thought at first, but now everything is clear. I might just finish it on time. Only if I get to finish my thesis as soon as freaking possible.

One of the things we agreed upon when we started the accelerated course was that we will continue our undergraduate thesis so that we don't have to start from scratch. I dunno what got in to me but I have decided to transfer to another research group because I want to explore the other research fields of chemistry. So from Biochemistry, I got myself in Sensors.

Since the start of the academic year, I've been doing my research because I need to work double-time in order to finish my thesis. But I was not that focused then because I still have other things to do, e.g. board exam review, academics, etc.

I realized that I should now work quadruple-time because I need to attend and present my work in the congress in Davao (April 2006) as part of my graduation requirements. That's just 5 months from now.

I am now going to spend most of my time in the lab to work work work till I go insane. The lab shall be my second home from now on.

Most people think of a Chemistry lab as a nerdy place with flasks having multi-colored solutions, fuming and smoky experiments, and a mad doctor mixing chemicals which will turn him into a super gwapo and swabe guy.

Well, that's not exactly reality. Solutions are mostly colorless or at least not multi-colored, smoky experiments are rarely done, and lab people are not exactly mad, they're just enthusiastic. =)

A common chemistry lab, in my opinion, looks something like the phytochem lab in the research center. When I go there, it's chem na chem.

Chem na chem from the reagent bottles...

To the working tables...

To the instrumental set-ups...

The sensors lab looks, well, a little different.

It looks chemistry-ish at first with the chemistry-ish environment.

With a fume hood...

But up close, it's really a pseudo-electronics lab.

We are working on sensors but our focus is on the chemistry side of it, not much on the electronics. But to make the chemical sensors work, the wires and the multimeters are also important. So, okay, the electronics part is also important.

This is my working table. We (me and my pseudo-thesismate) always try to make it look sleek and clean.

Just right across our table is Gordon's table.

From another angle.

That's chemistry and electronics. And garbage. And he's proud of that. He says he's just doing the final touches and is currently working on the patent of his instrument.

As for me, after all the "guy's work", this is what I came up with so far.

I have made three already. But the other two failed to be used as electrodes. I haven't tried this one.

This is just the start. I shall be working on my experiments for the months to come. I have to soon come up with an effective electronic nose (like those you see in CSI).

For months, I'll be running the other side of me.

Yes. Welcome to my lab life.

posted by Dorxie at 1:05 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Saturday, November 19, 2005

I feel the need to flood my blog

I realized that I am now fond of delayed posts.

I have been busy with school last week or at least tried to look busy with school work. My classes end late, and when I get home it's usually dad who uses the computer, thus I get no chance to blog, check mails, type school papers, and download songs. I just can't tell him to bugger off, he's DAD you know.

You see, even my dad is nocturnal (that's why he's my dad and no wonder I'm his daughter). He does our store inventory at night, when everybody else is sleeping. Everybody else sleeping except me. That's when my problem starts.

I try to sleep but to no luck. I have to wait for dad to finish in order to use the computer. But he finishes too late, like 2:00 or 3:00 am, and by then I'm already half-human, half-zombie.

Anyway, I got the chance to slip past dad's computer clutches, and so I'm taking advantage of it. I better do the typing fast before he discovers my furtive moves.

posted by Dorxie at 11:35 PM   [ 0 comments ]

Maybe I was male in my past life

12 November 2005

I am on the verge of believing that I was male in my past life.

For the past two weeks, the lab has been my second home, the place where I do my thesis. I've been doing the instrumentation part of my research and even Eds can tell that I've been trying to put so much passion in it. But to my dismay, the set-up keeps on failing and I have to prepare new electrodes again and again.

Preparing new electrodes is no joke. I have to literally be a lagarista because I have to cut down the big Perspex glass into several smaller pieces (with a saw), drill holes on each piece, mount graphite rods on the Perspex glass by inserting them in the holes, and affix copper wires onto each rod. This probably takes a whole day to make because the epoxy used to attach the copper wires to the graphite rods take forever to dry up.

And so for several days I've been doing a man's work. I believe my right arm has developed firm biceps by now because of too much use of a lagare (saw). Really, no joke.

And it didn't stop there. I've been asking mom to help me pimp my room. You see, my room has two beds, one for me and one for my sister Jhozelle. I've been asking mom to buy us a double-deck bed so that we can save space because I wanted a bigger study table. My prayers were finally answered last Sunday.

Earlier that day, I have to get rid of the old beds for the new bed's delivery. Peter also agreed to buy the old beds and the dresser that comes with it. Since everyone is busy with their own stuff, I dismantled my old bed. Not only mine, Jhozelle's too. And not only the beds, I dismantled the dresser too. And it was not an easy job.

Growing up, I was certain that I'm a girl. I never doubted my gender, there was never a time that I felt masculine at all. And so I am not used to doing the "guy's work". I mean, dad and my brother Abi are here to do that so the girls in the family are not obliged to do such things.

With my hidden masculine side finally unleashed two weeks ago, I still believe I am made up of mostly estrogen. I admire the women who do men's work for a living. Some you see driving jeeps, doing construction work, or bringing mails to houses but at the end of the day they still go home as a mom and raise their families.

Call me a feminist, but that's what I call girl power. =)


Yay! I now have a new lair of my own, bigger and better.

Deciding on what to put in it was sort of difficult because I do have a lot of things. I've decided to put some of my books to have a, ehem, studious look. And a nerdy look too. I placed a corkboard so I could put some little notes on because I'm so freaking forgetful that my grandmother could beat me in a memory contest.

And since I want to experience the feeling of real high because I am altophobic, I've decided to stay on the upper bed of our new double-deck. But Jhozelle wants to stay there too. So I told her we'll exchange places after a month.

Of course I'm older, I call the shots. So when are we going to exchange places, Jhozelle? Next month? How about never?

Ooh, that'll be cool.

posted by Dorxie at 11:30 PM   [ 0 comments ]

Guess who's back?

15 November 2005

After 3 weeks of agony, my iPod is finally back. And I hope it's for good.

They said they replaced it with a new one. My old iPod was named after me, Dorxie. But since this is a new iPod, this is not Dorxie anymore. I shall baptize it with a new name.

It shall be called Mayumi.

posted by Dorxie at 11:25 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Wednesday, November 16, 2005


I was about to post how I figured I was probably male in my past life when this incident in the Pinoy Big Brother House came to my attention.

Yeah, I watch PBB during prime time and sometimes I also get to see the Uplate. And I know that the nomination night was postponed because of what happened before the eviction night, the night where Jenny was voted out.

Earlier this night, the video was shown where Franzen was caught mouthing out words and writing down some sort of a message to Cass. This, according to the PBB house rules, is clearly a violation. This was the same mistake Franzen did few weeks ago when he passed a secret message to Jason, which was written naman on paper.

The point is, Franzen knew that it was forbidden. He also knew that if he commits another violation, he'll be out of the house.

Before the real video was shown, the network said they had to consult the producers of the show in Holland on what sanction should be given to the housemate involved. And Endemol in Holland said Franzen should be evicted.

Now the decision cannot be made. Not just yet. Because here's Cass who offered to voluntarily exit just so Franzen could still stay inside the PBB house. And then the network lets people decide who is it that they want to stay.

Okay. You're strict with your rules and you want them followed. It's clear that Franzen violated the house rules gazillion times, in fact Big Brother had to automatically nominate him for eviction because he's had too many mistakes already. You then consider the option of making him stay because somebody wants to go out instead of him. And now you are letting the people decide.

Endemol said it. HE SHOULD BE OUT.

Say, when Sam was evicted and Jason, for example, said he'll go out to of the house just to make Sam stay, will you let him do such thing? Since you're strict with the rules, is it in the rule book that if someone's evicted but somebody else says he/she will exit instead of the evictee, then evictee shall stay even if the people have already voted him/her off the island?

Simply put, do we have to decide who shall stay? With Endemol's answer and enough evidence, I think voting need not be done.

Maybe the network gets rich when people text in their answers. Yeah, it's money. Pera parin yun.

I'll say it again: Endemol said it. FRANZEN SHOULD BE OUT.

To the network: What part of that don't you understand?


Oh, and Constantine Maroulis is in the country now. Too bad I can't catch him, I'm way to busy to visit his mall tours. Bah!

posted by Dorxie at 3:08 AM   [ 0 comments ]
Thursday, November 10, 2005

Thesis, TV, and Sam Milby

I'm now in the Science student council office, alone and lonely.

I came to school at around 11:00 am to do thesis. But the freaking experiment keeps on failing and failing and I don't know what to do to fix things up. Real bummer.

So I gave up (just for today). I shall start my experiment again tomorrow.

I'm sort of worried. I don't know where my experiments are taking me, or where I am trying to head myself. Everything is just not in place right now. Everything is disoriented.

Anyway, my day is just starting. I have to wait in this office till 6 pm because I have a class till 9 pm. I'll probably doze off muna. I need some rest.


I'm just glad Paulo family's out of the Amazing Race. Too much shouting, arguing, and disrespecting. But then again, like what they said, it's just how they are.


Okay, we know Sam Milby's hot and talented and gwapo and all that jazz, but do you guys from ABS-CBN have to rub that in our faces ALL THE TIME? What happened to Rico, JB, Chx, Raquel and Bob? When I switch my TV on, si Sam nanaman!

Guess you make more money with Sam. Money, who can say no to it?

posted by Dorxie at 4:27 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Fast post again

I'm here in the sensors lab waiting for my pseudo-thesis mate to finish monitoring her samples. I'm supposed to do thesis too but she's using the set-up and it's 5:30 pm, therefore it's too late to start doing my work. With a lot of time my experiments take, I might as well take the place of the security guards and close the whole school then.

I'm just waiting for her to finish so she could tell me the other results she obtained for the past months. I haven't been doing my thesis for a couple of months now, but since she's my pseudo-thesis mate, I could use her optimization results when running my experiments.

So there, not much is new here. I just added a random question that pops out of my mind when I'm idle and a thought for everyone to ponder on. Have fun around! =)


Hi to my cousins Kris and Allan, and the whole Crooc family in Canada, who appears to check this blog every now and then. God bless you all! *smooches*

posted by Dorxie at 5:34 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Monday, November 07, 2005

This needs a title but I can't think of one so just read on, reader.

Back-to-school days seem to be still too long from now, unless of course I get my mind to touch the reality that it is, in fact, just a day away.

Chris was right (see Tag Board). I, too, am not in the mood for school. Not just yet. It's supposed to be still my sem break. It didn't even reach two weeks. I still want to bum around the house, spend hours in the mall, and sleep all day.

When I lay on my bed and start thinking about school, I try to do something else, like read a book or look at old pictures. Because I know the moment I step in school, I shall be starting my rigorous, labor-intensive, head-spinning, neck-breaking, period-inducing thesis. I am not only worried about the lab work, I'm much scared of the paper work. PAPERS, for heaven's sake. Journals to read, proposals to make, reports to complete, and log books to fill. All papers.

So for the past couple of days left of my sem break, I decided to forget about school muna. It's just too damn stressful. I have decided to read books that are lying around in my room.

I just finished Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder. I started this book months ago because I was required to read it, but I never got to finish it because I was too occupied with many things. I know it's a best-seller and all, but it just didn't hit me like my favorite classics. It's not, like, Bang!

Maybe the reason why I didn't enjoy it much is because I am really not into philosophy, which the book is all about. I should say the twist of the story was good and exciting, but all the rest just didn't catch much of my interest. Anyway, the book was okay, it was so-so. I have to say Gaarder must have put a lot of effort in making the story line. Very impressive.

Now I am starting a book given to me by Ninay two years ago. Yes, two years ago. You see, I luuurrve reading books but most of the time I don't get to finish a book because something almost always comes up. I do finish them, but not just by isang upuan. You know what I mean.

But of course, there are books worth reading just with isang upuan lang. There's JD Salinger's The Catcher in the Rye, definitely my favorite. And Neil Gaiman's American Gods and Sandman. And Harper Lee's To Kill a Mockingbird. And... ehem... Sophie Kinsella's Shopaholic series.

Anyway, I'm currently reading Anita Shreve's Eden Close. I have not gone too far with the first chapter, but I plan to read the most that I can today. With one day before the start of school, I think reaching the last page of this book may be pushed for several days.

When I get enough moolah, I plan to buy some classics I saw at Powerbooks. I am eyeing for Chronicles of a Death Foretold and Love in the Time of Cholera, both by Gabriel Garcia-Marquez, poetry compilations of Pablo Neruda, and the Rosales saga by F. Sionil Jose.

Talk about bookworm mode.


Why is it that when you play the violin too dem well, especially when you're a kid, people consider you as an amazing, oh-so-talented person? What is it about the violin?

If you play the guitar or the flute well, are you considered less talented? Why is violin a sign of brilliance? Is it that hard to learn?

I shall find out myself.


21 days to go. Good luck to all our athletes for the 23rd SEA Games. Raise high the flag of our country. Go Philippines! Be proud to be Pinoy!

posted by Dorxie at 12:12 AM   [ 0 comments ]
Friday, November 04, 2005

Lazy Friday

I'm left here at home with nothing to do but think about the things I will do when school starts.

And thinking about it makes me not want to think about it anymore. Suddenly, I'm so not in the mood to make my mind work.

Oh, and what happened to the planning, you say? I'm at home. Go figure.

posted by Dorxie at 5:02 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Thursday, November 03, 2005

Dilemma for the Nth time.

I'm in a dilemma.

You see, I have a planning session with the Parish Youth Ministry this weekend. I shall represent Better Living - DWTL, and in addition I will also start with the planning of the new org, the PYM Volunteers.

The PYM Volunteers is something like my old org, the College and High School Volunteers. This time, it doesn't only cover high school and college students who are required to render church service but also out-of-school youth and anyone who feels like joining.

The new org is just starting, and so several things need to be straighten up before we officially start it. Ergo, the planning part is really important.

The problem is, I have not enrolled myself yet. And I might have the last chance to do that on Saturday.

One choice is that I leave the planning on Saturday, but then it would be too bitin. And I'm not sure yet if the Grad School will be open. I just have to go there and see.

This is hard. I have to make up my mind soon.


Yay!!! My blog has a new look! This is Bleeding and Believing version 5.1.

New links are found in the navigation area on your right. Click on the thumbnails to see the whole album. I have uploaded photos in my Multiply account, but this is for the mean time only. I plan to put up a site just for my pics.

So go ahead, click and bite me. =)

posted by Dorxie at 11:21 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Wednesday, November 02, 2005

The problem with Hello is Goodbye

Goodbye is not my most favorite word in the whole wide world. In fact, I don't have it included in my dictionary.

There were several things-slash-persons I said goodbye to for the past few months.

Him. College. CSJ. My green butterfly Havaianas. My fone. My long hair. Happiness for a while, which I got back easily, thanks to my wonderful friends. Shenley, who went to Japan, and who is now back, stronger and very much happy.

Then I had to let go of my iPod last week. Mama Tessang left us just a week ago. My old org in the church was declared dead just last Sunday.

Two days from now I have to let go of a dear friend, Kat. She's leaving for the US, and honestly, it did not sink into me until last Friday, October 28, when we had our despedida for her.

It was a total get-together-slash-reunion for us because Shenley was back. So the girls went on to have the first shot.

A closer look. (Me, Syk, Sheila, Shen, Kat)

Sheila and I kept on joking with how Japanese people take their pics with a peace sign. I'm sure everyone have observed that.

You see, when the Japanese take pics, they always make the peace sign with their hand. Really. You'll see that even in anime. No offense meant to the Japanese. I mean, it's like a requirement when they take pics. It's like the peace sign SHOULD be there, or else the photos will not come out nice. Like Kodak will sabotage the pics when they do not see the peace sign when they develop pics.

Anyway, we came to the conclusion that the Japanese are always making pa-cute, and so they consider the peace sign as a useful tool to look cute. But we can't be too sure until we try it out ourselves.

And we proved ourselves correct! Teehee!

Later on, PA arrived with TJ, Teppy and Tep's cousin Guia. The barx girls roster was nearly completed (Minay and Noemi were not able to make it) when Teij and Eds came.

And because we are cam whores...

Teij and Eds needed to try out the peace sign too. But Eds wasn't that "game". Maybe she didn't want to feel Japanese at all. Haha!

After our dinner at the Seafood Club, we invaded IO in Jupiter.

They deserved another shot.

It was almost 4 am when we went home. IO was closing and our bill was going sky high.

Then suddenly it hit me. I thought, I won't be seeing Kat for some time. I won't be able to take pics with her for months or even years. I had to seize the moment.

One more, the sepia look.

Before we went home, I gave Kat my dangling earrings, three bracelets, and a card.

TO KAT, I hope you read this before you leave:

I'll miss you, Kat. I'll miss our college days, our chikahan in every subject that needs no alphabetical seating arrangement, our trips to Baguio and Zamboanga, your home cooked meals in our Pacdal Liteng home in Baguio, and all our memories together.

But above all, I'll miss having a friend who cries over very mababaw things, who has an immeasurable patience, who is pretty not only outside but also inside, who is almost a sister to me.

Kat, you are one of my closest friends ever and I'll always be thankful for that. Take over South Carolina!

Ahluvyah Mare!


Yay! A new blog look! Whacha think?!

posted by Dorxie at 6:58 PM   [ 0 comments ]
Tuesday, November 01, 2005

To the faithfully departed

Today we remember our loved ones who passed away...

To Tatay Choy, Lolo, Wawa, Tito Bill, Chong Pepe, Mama Tessang, Marianne, Kuya Nelson, Kuya OB, Yani, Cardinal Sin, Pope John Paul II, and all the faithfully departed, may your souls rest in paradise and may you find eternal happiness with Kuya Jess.


Happy Halloween everyone!

posted by Dorxie at 4:11 AM   [ 0 comments ]

v5.7 Copyright (c) 2005, Dorx Crooc All Rights Reserved.

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